What's meaty and has a poof? A meatball with a bubble.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Two strangers are sitting at a bar having a drink. One is a young, fat, red-headed guy named Fred. The other is an elderly grey-haired man. After a while, Fred turns to the old man and awkwardly asks: "Excuse me sir would ya' mind givin me some advice? There's this girl who has sat next to me on the bus every morning for the past three months. She's the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She always smiles and winks at me. I wannna ask her on a date but every time I go to do it I freeze. I just don't know what to say. I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm falling for this girl and I don't know what in the world to do. Any tips?" The old man continues to sit quietly, slowly sipping his drink. After a while the old man looks at Fred. "Hmmm" says the old man, as he thinks over Fred's question. "What is your name son?" He asks Fred. "It's Fred sir," replies Fred. "Hmmm," the old man says again as he continues to think over Fred's question. The old man then stands up, takes out a gun, and shoots Fred in the face. Fred never saw it coming.

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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An Oldish (probably 27) man walks into a chuck-e cheese, He then puts on his coustume.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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Hitler is my role model

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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