how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

potatoes

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

Why was johny late to school? He died

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

ps3

What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

h

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

I'm not as random as you think i salad.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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