knock knock Come in.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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You know what's funny about table salt? Not much.

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I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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Jack and Jill climb a tall hill to get some water from the well for there farther who has been working in the fields. Jack trips and hits his hell on a rock and Jill promptly calls 911 and stays with him until help arrives.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

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A Mexican walks into a club.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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