Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

Quit repeating the damn jokes you jackasses it ruins the laughter. Like if you agree.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

The WNBA

What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

your momma is so old, she has heart problems

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

Boobs are nasty!

GAY PEOPLE

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

Why couldn't the little boy skate? He had cancer.

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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