A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did the chicken cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What lives underground? Grandpa

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

where do the women go? the womanarium

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats worse than flunking math? death.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops