Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

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Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

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why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Women's rights.

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Poopsack Jones

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops