what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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Tim's gay.

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What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

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Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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Whats the best thing that happened to the jews The Holocaust

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

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FOLLOW ME @airvvv

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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I don't get it

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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