Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q. How do you kill a fish A. You don't have to BP already did

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Banana(s)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is the difference between a black man and a white man? Different skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Fuck her

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops