What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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whats better than shoes feet

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

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Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops