How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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Get in the van

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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Water, please.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

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jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

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A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

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How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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