Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

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What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What is brown and sticky?

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French people

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So dont touch it

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A van drives into a car.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Y2K

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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Women's rights.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

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Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

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Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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