Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Its a chicken, giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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What time is it? 12:03 AM

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When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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Come in

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if u dislike this u r most likely depressed

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Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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You know George Washington? He died.

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your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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Hi colton

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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My butt!!!!

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whats young and never moved? still born baby

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops