What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

Baseball

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

option 1, minecraft VS option 2, friends

two fish are in a tank.

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

My friends are like trampolines I have none

im black

A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

Hey you want to hear a joke? Oh well. Goodbye

Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

Grapefruit.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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