How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

Women

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

you wanna hear a joke? no

Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

Gadaffi

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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