Penis

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Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

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Canada

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. I'm calling the police.

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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So i walk in my house after drinking that night.... my wall is green

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Orange!" "Oranges can't speak, who is this really?" "Your neighbor Jake, can I borrow your lawn mower?" "Sure, let me go to the garage and get it for you."

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wuts at the end of the world? nothing the earth is spherical and therefore does not have an end

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why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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Men's rights.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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Hello I'm a fat kid

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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