How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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haha.

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Q: What's big and white and can't climb trees? A: a fridge

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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