A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

Turtles

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

Billy was walking along the sidewalk. He strayed into someone's yard. He got run over by a lawnmower because he couldn't see with the frog he had stapled to his face.

What's brown a sticky? -A stick

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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