what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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