- Anti Joke

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

no

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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