- Anti Joke

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

How you know when dislextic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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