Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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