In Soviet Russia, you drive the car, fill it up with gas, and park it. Just like in America.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

Jimmy Saville

Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

What did the American man say to his brother right before his brother's wedding? You should not get married because most likely your marriage will end in a horrible divorice, which will ruin the rest of your pathetic life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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