How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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A women left the kitchen.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Eric is gay Ha

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops