Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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