what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

Your big dick.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...