God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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do you like hardcore music? ya i love brokencyde

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Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops