Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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FUCK YOU

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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