What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops