Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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hello anomonous

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what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

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Wats do you get when you combine a vampire and a ginger? Idk, who would pull that disgusting shit

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

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Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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