What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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knock knock go away

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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