Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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