What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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