How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

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what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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a black man pays his child support

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roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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