hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

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A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

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Ol-ive

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You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

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why is cancer a big thing because its bad

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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