Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

knock knock? come in

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

knock knock Goodbye

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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