One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

thumb_up thumb_down +21

You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

bangers and mash?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops