Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

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Women deserve equal rights.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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