-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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