A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

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what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops