What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops