What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy's mother say to her daughter when she walked in on her father having sex with her grandmother? The grandfather said "how are you"? He wasn't a part of that fiasco. However I'm sure that whoever saw what was confused and looking for answers.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops