The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -4

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did one duck say to the other duck? Quack.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red poo is poo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops