why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

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roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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Jims family is having a picnic. Jim goes and gets his food. shortly after he drops his food. Jim is really sad and goes and gets more food. Jim is black

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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