Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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Why is my penis rainbow colored?

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

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What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

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Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

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How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops