q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

A Bull walks into a bar. it killed three people by the fact it was a Bull

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

Your mom went to college

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

A man walks into a bar after a hard day of work, and he meets this girl and they really kick it off, so the girl says, "lets go somewhere more, private" and they both go to a more secluded bar that has less decibels of noise.

Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says "Well, it's a long story but I tell you. You see, one day I was walking along the beach and I found a dusty old lamp. I rubbed the lamp and a big magic genie appeared. He told me I could have 3 wishes." The horse continues: "So I told the genie I wish I had a 10 billion dollars. I checked my bank account and sure enough it came true. My second wish was I wished for a beautiful wife. Suddenly a light came from the sky like an angel falling and I saw a beautiful woman and fell in love with her." The bartender says to the horse "Let me guess, so for your third wish, did you wish you were a horse with a long face?" The horse says "No that's not what I wished for." The bartender asks "What was your third wish?" The horse says "Well you won't believe me but I wished I was a bartender pretending to talk to a horse about some genie granting him wishes." After about 30 minutes of arguing with himself, other employees at the bar had had enough of the bartender talking to himself and called psychiatric personnel to escort the bartender to the mental hospital as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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