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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall: "Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!! by darragh hamilton

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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guess what what ...

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Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops