Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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And you honored it I see :P

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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Eric is gay Ha

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What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops