How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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What's the difference between a plumber and a gynecologist? One has a knowledge of piping system of a house and the ability to fix said pipes and the other has the medical knowledge of a women's vagina.

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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Knock, Knock. Who's there Hey, it's Dave. Oh well come on in.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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