What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

american idol

A wise man once said, "I am wise".

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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