Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

Killing your friend as a joke.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

kkkk

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

knock knock Dave's not here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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